The Difference Between A Chick And A Full Grown Woman

By: Cassandra Mack. www.strategiesforempoweredliving.com

There are times in a man’s life when he confuses a chick with a full grown woman. He sees a pretty face, a nice body, an inviting smile, an easy lay and allows a fleeting momentary desire to cloud his judgment ...and break up everything he’s worked so hard to build.

He looks at the ease of not having to work that hard…not having to make a real investment of time, commitment or emotions. He looks at the thrill of getting a little piece on the side. Not realizing that more often than not, it’s the side dish that costs more than the main course when you average it all out. Plus, when the novelty wears off, he finds out the hard way that the side dish, although appetizing at first glance, can never truly fill or hold him down like the main course he already has at home.

Men be careful…the side dish will bring you drama, break up your family, wipe you out financially, create a scene on the job. But the main course who you often take for granted will help you to build, sustain and grow.

See the main course, if you let her, will make you a better man. She understands how to weather life’s storms, so when you fall down, she’s right there to pick you up. The side dish can never walk in the main course’s shoes. She’s simply not equipped. And since she’s not the struggling kind, if you ever fall off financially she’ll kick your butt to the curb faster than a New York minute. However, the main course being a woman of wisdom, won’t trip if you fall off financially…and if she does it won’t be for long because like the Proverbs 31 woman, she knows how to make a dollar out of fifteen cents.

Sometimes in an act of desperation or naivety, the side dish will step out of pocket and call the main course to curse her out and “set the record straight,” not realizing that the main course is too much of a lady to be brought down by something on the side.

It’s important not to confuse the main course’s ability to keep herself and her children away from extracurricular drama with being a doormat. The main course is not naive or stupid. She is simply trying to keep her family together. Plus, it’s but so many times the side dish can step out of her lane before the main course unleashes her inner lioness and rips the side dish to shreds.

Let me be clear here: In no way am I advocating violence, but if you are bad enough to play in another woman’s garden and bold enough to call her house to brag about it, then you really shouldn’t be too dumbfounded when she goes into her ghetto bag and unleashes a can of full grown whoop ass.

In an attempt to upgrade, some men foolishly trade in their main course for the side dish, not realizing that since the side chick has just been hatched, she does not have the staying power, wisdom or loyalty to stand by their side for better or worse. Therefore, unbeknownst to many men, the side chick can be their biggest liability. But the full grown woman who strives to hold it down at home despite your desire to sample every passing item on the menu and who has seen you through the best of times and the worst of times, has already proven herself to be one of your greatest assets.

Sometimes, during moments of loneliness, failed relationships or depleted self-esteem a main course kind of lady will reduce herself to side chick status. It’s not that she’s a side chick at heart. It’s that loneliness got the best of her or she falsely believes that she cannot do any better. So she avails herself to somebody else’s man convincing herself that half a man is better than no man at all. And since she's lost all common sense, she somehow believes that she has hit the jackpot. When the truth of the matter is, it’s not that He’s ALL THAT… He’s just ALL THAT SHE HAS.

Make no mistake about it, the difference between a chick and a full grown woman has nothing to do with age. There are 40 year old chicks and 20 year old full grown women. It's not an age thing. It's a self-worth thing.

It’s been said that boys will be boys and a man’s gonna do what a man’s gonna do. But if I might be so bold as to offer an alternative point of view….When you have a taste for something on the side, take a moment to think about what you stand to lose before you order out.

Although there are lots of options on the menu, in the long run the best option is to eat in, keep it at home and add a little spice so you can bring out the flavor in your main course. You just might be pleasantly surpised. It’s your life…Just my take on the issue.

Remember – You hold the pen that writes the chapters of your life,
Cassandra Mack

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Copyright © 2009 by Cassandra Mack. A portion of this article was excertped from Cassandra Mack's book. "The Black Man's Little Book of Encouragement." To order your copy go to: http://www.strategiesforempoweredliving.com

******Cassandra Mack, MSW, is a trained social worker, keynote speaker, consultant, corporate trainer, author of several successful books including, "Young, Gifted and Doing It: 52 Power Moves for Teens, " Cool, Confident and Strong: 52 Power Moves for Girls," "The Busy Woman's Little Book of Motivation," and "The Single Mom's Little Book of Wisdom," which are all available at: Amazon.com. Cassandra is the founder and CEO of Strategies for Empowered Living Inc. a company dedicated to helping people grow through empowering workshops, in-service training, personal-growth products and consultation services. For more information go to: http://www.strategiesforempoweredliving.com